the way to hump a cow is not… (14)

the way to hump a cow is not
to get yourself a stool
but draw a line around the spot
and call it beautifool

to multiply because and why
dividing thens by nows
and adding and(i understand)
is hows to hump a cows

the way to hump a cow is not
to elevate your tool
but drop a penny in the slot
and bellow like a bool

to lay a wreath from ancient greath
on insulated brows
(while tossing boms at uncle toms
is hows to hump a cows

the way to hump a cow is not
to push and then to pull
but practicing the art of swot
to preach the golden rull

to vote for me(all decent mem
and wonens will allows
which if they don’t to hell with them)
is hows to hump a cows

Analysis, meaning and summary of e.e. cummings's poem the way to hump a cow is not… (14)


  1. Anonymous says:

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  2. Asian says:

    hmm… yaknow, after reading this i got really curious and since i own a barn i tried it a few days ago. It did work and almost felt as good as my wife, but i did end up using a stool.

  3. Fran says:

    How old is this audience, I wonder. This poem is FUNNY folks. Remember HUMOR – I don’t dare put a question mark behind any of the comments I make for fear it “will be removed.” I always believed this poem was written in response to Ernest Hemmingway’s huge bestseller, “The Sun Also Rises,” which was lauded and drooled over by cummings’ mortal enemy – ‘the world of Academe.’ But regardless of WHY it was written, you should be able to GET the satirical, humorous tone of this poem. What a bunch of dummies.

  4. jesus says:

    id rather hump an ashlee

  5. kimberley Szarek says:

    T think this is a very gross poem and is totally unbelivable.

  6. ea says:

    this poem makes me glad that I delete most of the cow patties eventually.

  7. Kau Huumper says:

    cow pussy smells funny…..

  8. Brandon Parsons says:

    I really liked this poem me and my boyfriend Jacob Dobson tryed what everybody else did humping a cow it was awesome it really does work. Now Me and my boyfriend do it all the time

  9. Jordon Dobson says:

    This poem is somewhat weird. but then i thought about it and then i started humping cow and it went MOOOOOOOO!!!!

  10. Amanda says:

    e.e. cummings wrote this poem as a political satire. I absolutely love it. Although he did write it with obvious political undertones (uncle toms and vote) its sing-songy rhythm and rhyming nature givie it a humorous feeling. cummings, although an amazingly talented and opinionated man wrote poetry such as this for its hilarity. C’mon folks… humping cows is funny (when you write about it) please please please don’t over analyze this poem and ruin it.

  11. Mikey James says:

    I have been to American only a few months and often drive by cows while I am on my way to the border. I tried humping a cow after first reading this poem because I wanted to be american-like (americans are odd and strange, but they invented mcdonalds and those are made of cows!) But my stool wasn’t long enough–but I did give the cow a tip for it’s services. The milk was rather nice to drink.. better than the milk from my homeland.

  12. Lindsay says:

    Wow I think cows are hot now. Next time I tip one over. I will try to reinact this poem..mooo

  13. Prof. Aaron Merkin says:

    This poem, out of a majority of E.E.’s more “traditional” works, stands out for its provocative nature. Many scholors have debated weather or not beastiality is an allegory for personal fears. However in my research I have discorverd writings which indicate that E.E. may have had many sexual encounters with animals as a child. This information came from one of his childhood friends who had lived on a barn and had wrote an anthology of memoirs growing up with E.E.. These had never been published but they were discovered. In descript detail this anthology continues to describe their homo-erotic behaviors. This could be the basis behind this poem.

  14. jeremy miller says:

    This poem is great, I lOVE IT! IT IS TOTALLY TRUE

  15. tom ado says:

    i hump lots of cows now

  16. napolean says:

    wow dose this only work on cows

  17. James says:

    I did a setting of this poem. One of my favorites from his excellent er… caustic catalog.

  18. Chris says:

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! That is so funny…I didn’t know old boring poets had a sense of humor…

  19. maeve says:

    Well. That’s an interesting one.

  20. Patrice says:

    i think ee cummings poem is very funny. he is a very hott too. and funny

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